This is my floorboard
look at this and tell me it doesn’t look like there’s a tiny dog trapped in there
learning good manners at a young age
switching on your computer before you make yourself food so by the time you come back your computer is turned on and waiting for you like a naked lover
being 17 is weird because you can get hit on by 14-year-olds and 20-year-olds and it’s THE SAME AGE DIFFERENCE
It’s also weird because you can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life. You are the dancing queen, young and sweet, only seventeen
i called my grandpa to wish him a happy 69th birthday and he said, “I skipped straight to 70. I don’t do 69 anymore, I’m too old to bend that way” and started laughing hysterically
my sister and i were pulling weeds in the yard this morning and i got distracted
It gets even cuter the longer you watch it.
he jumps as high as he can and just plops down
"cover up more or else you’ll distract the boys"
but that is my plan
i will expose as much skin as i possibly legally can. distract the boys. boys everywhere, enticed by my skin and the tops of my boobs and my super cute butt. they will be so distracted that i will lead them, like the pied piper, to their imminent doom.
my plot to overthrow the patriarchy will be complete. hallelujah. let us rejoice. amen.